Instant Gratification....Have a Little Patience, Faith

It's so hard for me...to be patient.  I want results in the flash of an eye, and if it doesn't happen...."FAILURE."  I still have WAY TO MUCH invested in what I think other people are thinking.  I see how it effects everything I do.

I don't post photos of myself online...because I am ashamed of the way I look.  I make excuses NOT to go out of the house, not to attend events because of the shame and lack of vital energy.  What it boils down to, is that I no longer have any FAITH in myself.  And isn't that a sad place to be.

(I wrote the above passage last night.)  And then this morning I walked into my studio, looked at the painting I had been working on yesterday and realized...I have come a long way since I first started to dabble with painting & art.  And how have I reached this particular point?  Consistency over time.  Would I be much better now if I'd have dedicated more time to the effort?  Of course.  But I can see progress...and that is a very good thing.

So...art reflects life, and life reflects art.  I can take a lesson from this progress and grasp the understanding that my effort and consistency is directly proportional to my result.  Anything that is flailing in my life is due to neglect.  

Gosh, when put that way it seems so simple.  I guess it is simple if you KEEP IT SIMPLE!  We often get so tied up in the clutter of our minds if we do not take care with our minds.  We are often tempted by so many things outside of ourselves if we do not have a CLEAR INTENTION in our mind on which to stay focused.

So...for myself, I have begun yet again.  And however many tries it takes, you must keep starting over until you find yourself securely on your path and making progress.  Every single time you perceive you have been knocked down, see how fast you can get up and forget it.  Pretty soon, things that would have knocked you OUT....will seem only like pesky little gnats.  Pretty soon, you'll be handling things like a CHAMP.  You have to MAKE A PLAN though...and RESOLVE TO STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE....because this is the way we GROW.

All right.  Enough of that for today!!!!  Take good care of yourselves and visit me again soon!

Peace Out & Love Each Other,

Cynthia

Everything You Need...

8X12 inches on canvas board

     This was a commissioned piece and I had a lot of fun doing it.  In fact, I had never done curly hair, big boobs or a nurses hat before...so that was a fun and new challenge, and I was really pleased with the result.

     It's also kind of neat she's a nurse....because the Number One thing I need to be taking care of right now is my health.  I'm terribly overweight (a place I never thought I'd be) and have had so many health problems keeping me down for so long.  First, I have depression.  Through a succession of moves and things, I became more and more isolated, fearful.  Which made me more overweight, more isolated and more fearful. The depression is something that once you know you have it, you will always be susceptible...and you will always have to take special care with yourself.  i.e. Eating right, getting regular exercise and fresh air, adequate sleep, small to no alcohol intake.  Otherwise you are like a rope whipping in the wind...at the wind's will...not your own.  Nothing else in your life has a chance of being normal or feeling right...or growing into something great when you are on this roller coaster ride.

Now, if you don't take care of yourself, depression will start to get out of hand and cloud every action, every judgment you make, such that you act and make decisions based on the chaos, sadness and frustration you are carrying versus making clear, concise decisions that will actually benefit you.  I know.  In fact, I think that many other ailments are actually borne from having and NOT DEALING WITH having DEPRESSION.

I have also had to deal with severe anemia and iron deficiency;  talk about the WALKING DEAD!!!  These things made the depression worse....and I've sort of been replaying this LOOP to NOWHERE for quite a while.Why not just go to the doctor and get it fixed?  No insurance, no funds.  It's just not that easy to do anything when you're down and out.

So where does one turn to get relief from illness?  The internet (researching)...for more natural solutions.  The local health food store (here, the Heritage) for natural supplements that could help.  Why didn't I think of this before? Because my brain has been malfunctioning for quite some time!!!  And, I guess I didn't believe that anything but fibroid removal would help....because that's what the doctor indicated.  Hmmm.

I am so lucky right now to have time to take care of myself and get back on the right track.  So it's truly ALL UP TO ME.  Now, will there be tons of hurdles to jump?  Absolutely.  But you just have to keep on keeping on....barrel through the roadblocks KNOWING YOU CAN MAKE IT!  God gave you everything you will ever need at the moment of your birth....everything you will ever need to CREATE a BEAUTIFUL LIFE!  So get busy CREATING...I AM!

Peace and Love, Cynthia

More on...The Process....

2014 

2014

~~~~ Above is a set of mermaids that I started in August 2013 after leaving a job that had become very uncomfortable for many reasons.  Finished these around January 2014, when I added the last touches of gold leafing, which really made all the difference!~~~~~

MORE ON....THE PROCESS...

Well, I spent all of last week...or most of it, working on my studio room.  I have revamped this room many, many times, but that is what we must do, as we move along in our interests and in our perspective processes. As a mixed media artist, I have had so many desires to pursue.   There are so many wonderful crafts, arts, jewelry projects...so many different things one can do, it is overwhelming yet we cannot stop ourselves from diving in head first.  And that is OK.  We each need to do that sometimes to find our one true love, our one calling...or realize that we have many different sources of artistic nourishment in which we may carry out the finest determinations of our souls.

I think the best part of all is to realize that there is no end, there is no real destination...for a destination would put limits on powers that should be understood as limitless.  So, in other words, believe in the greatness that you are with all that has come to make you and act in such a way.  Fulfill you soul's purpose, exceed even your wildest imaginings.

And in a more tangible reality, I am continuing the process of cleansing, organizing my studio...facilitating a much greater work environment than I have ever had before.  While changing things around, I realize as well that I am coming full circle, bringing out my sewing machine and fabrics that had been tucked back into the closet because it's time to revisit some older projects with a new flair, and begin other projects that have long awaited in my minds eye to be realized.

Do I have some WONDERFUL, FANTASTICAL PHOTOS OF MY LOVELY STUDIO.....
NO!!!! Not yet.  I'm taking my time with the process and focusing on getting it all a bit more organized and workable than it's ever been before.  It's OK to take the time and "do it right."  Especially if you find you have the time to spare.

I will try to take some photos though...they make the process so much more real for those looking in from the outside.

Take good care of yourself, and come visit me again :)

Cynthia

Trust the Process

"Trust the Process," 8" X 10", 2013

     It's often a difficult thing to do....'trust in the process,' no matter to what it may be pertaining.  This little lady has a paintbrush and an empty canvas behind her;  sometimes it's hard to even START something, much less have the courage to continue on with said endeavor.  However, this is exactly what we must do in order to achieve the things we so desire in life.

    After you start a painting (for instance), and get to a place where you are really liking what has been created, there often will creep into the mind such thoughts as, "Oh gosh, I'm afraid now...I don't want to MESS IT UP.!"  I know, I've been there. But trust that if you created it once, you can create it again.  Trust that if you've made it this far, you can go the distance.  The same applies to the other end of the spectrum where perhaps you are painting something and you keep not liking it. It's just not where you want to be yet. That's right.  It's a process.  And we cannot expect a masterpiece right out of the gate.  It takes time, patience and work.  It's at this point we can either COMMIT WHOLEHEARTEDLY to the process, or we can give up...on a piece (of art we are trying to create), our health, relationships, our dream of a whole and fulfilling life.

     I have gotten so off track with my own health, not wanting to face challenges head on, that it has overwhelmed me and pushed every other part of my life off track as well.  BALANCE is KEY and when one part is unbalanced, so is the whole machine.  For instance, I am currently happy with where my artwork is headed, and quite unhappy with most of the rest of my life.  But, I am putting things in place to change those feelings and turn it all around.

     COMMITTING WHOLEHEARTEDLY may also mean more than we think at a first glance.  First, we must till the soil and make ready for a successful garden to grow.  If we start trying to grow a garden in a patch of rocks and weeds, we will be sorely disappointed with the entire process.  So: PAVE THE WAY FOR SUCCESS...set yourself up to be successful.  How?  Get rid of the rocks.  Rocks are the old resentments that we carry, the well ingrained patterns of which we refuse to let go, all the things that no longer serve us, and probably never did.  Then, get rid of the weeds.  Weeds are different.  They will start to peek their heads and grow at any time in our lives.  We must recognize a weed as a weed, pull it up by the roots and say....goodbye.  Some of my weeds have been family members, so called friends, people with bad attitudes that try and push their filth onto me, poisonous people or situations, soul suckers (workplace or wherever.)  We must not give even an iota of our precious energy to the weeds.

     So...that's where I'm going to begin...tilling the garden and making ready for a new, balanced, successful life that I adore.  I'll be writing more about this topic and keeping you updated on my progress.  There's so much out there to discover, so much to tap into, let's make the best of it.

     Let me know about your journey too.  We really are all in this together.

Love and Peace...and all Good Things

Cynthia
   

   

Fun with Journals!

Sweet girl, journal book, 2014

     Like many mixed media artists, I have ideas all the time....for which I consequently BUY stuff to make said ideas come to life.  Then said items lay around the studio until one day, years later, the idea comes to fruition.  This was such an idea.

     Some time back I bought several journals so that I might paint or collage their fronts and backs.  I did collage some of the journals and then left the rest for another day, another project.  Cut to years later, now I am painting little characters and faces and so I decided to 'doctor up' some more journals with these sweet little figures.

Front

Back

Front

Back

Front, all done in 2013

So, that's just some fun stuff you can do adding characters to your journals covers.  Have a great day!

Cynthia

Reworking Older Pieces

   

     I made these pieces back in 2009 and hung on to them thinking I might one day have them published in a magazine.  Cut to last week....2014; I took a look at them again and decided they deserved better!  They deserved for me to perk them up and make them all they can be.  So, I did.

     Reworking the faces in both, and the background of the top one, left the pieces looking quite a bit more pleasing to the eye.  Now they are really ready to hit the road.  Available in my etsy shop.

Take care and have a great day!
Cynthia

"Party Animals," & Sharing with Friends

"Party Animals," by Cynthia Anderson, WIP, 2014

Hey there!  Made most of "Party Animals," this past Saturday while painting with my best friend, who I am so lucky to have:)  I was just thinking the tittle was appropriate since this is now 'my favorite kind of partying'....and in light of how much fun we had.  We very much enjoy getting together in my studio to paint, talk about painting, the universe, science, aliens, ghosts....to listen to music, and when all that gets old, turn on Ron White and laugh ourselves into a coma because we love TATER SALAD!!!  When they say laughter is the best medicine, they aren't kidding;  there's nothing like some deep belly laughs to make you GLOW.

I think it's so important to make the time for moments such as these.  Sharing in what we love, engaging each other's sensibilities, it's what life is all about.  Plus, it's one thing to share your life with a spouse and children...your family;  but there is nothing quite like sharing with friends.

Have a great day, and pass it on to someone else:)

Cynthia